Intention

We do not have the luxury to define how life prevails us. We can only choose our intent under it’s weight.

 

It is easy to exist – to be owned by fear, sadness or anger. It can be the most exhausting of things to take the weight of emotion and redirect it into purpose. A common narrative in our culture is that doing life selflessly is most difficult and inconvenient. There is such focus on how any given thing will impact you….you….you…it’s everywhere. What if the narrative was about sharing? Sharing in joys, successes, the honest to goodness soul crushing moments? Can you imagine how rich and vibrant “existing” could be?

 

The heaviness of life has not lifted – it spins and curls in every attempt to make a permanent home here. Our efforts to find normalcy get trapped under our need to process. Our need to process gets trapped under our fear of feeling. Our fear of feeling is the greatest of fears. It can be small things – choosing a different line at the grocery store because we see an infant seat…skipping a meeting because someone brings their child to work…walking away from a conversation riddled with the joys of parenthood. Every moment is owned, whether a milestone or failure. Every moment is a part of this perpetual process. Our intent is to keep moving; to be productive, not just dwell on the bad. In the moving and the smiling and the social experiments, there are moments where sitting in silence is necessary. It could be an evening, a week, a month… It is whatever it needs to be. The walls we build in our silence can be temporary or permanent, it’s up to us to fight against permanence. Instinct can rule our action, it cannot rule the intention of our heart. We remain vigil to our intent.

 

We are in a season of silence. We may not be reaching out to family and friends often, but we are good. We are busy with the day to day – allowing ourselves to get lost in work and projects. We are aware, we are present in this season to not let it become the norm, but this is where we need to function right now. We look forward to a season where silence is not the theme but this one feels right. We are surrounded near and far by the most gracious family and friends. The consistent contact, in all its forms, is so dear. We appreciate it even if we do not respond.

 
In other news we have had record breaking heat – the highest so far has been 106! It’s hot, yes, but honestly, it’s really not that bad. It certainly makes Idahoians grumpy, but we would take this any day over humidity and mosquitos. Our sweet friends let us borrow their kayaks last weekend – here are some shots from beautiful Lake Pond Orielle

Mick

old door | new door – house update

There are many things about our house we hope to change in the coming years. There a few items on that list we hope to start this summer. For those things further down the list – we are doing temporary fixes. The first being our front door. We are both fairly picky about the style we want. I am a huge fan of natural light and the front of our house receives a lot in the afternoons. What I’m NOT a big fan of is answering the door. Ever. [unless I know you’re coming over.] I generally hide and refuse to open it. This causes a slight issue – preferably a solid door with a peep hole – one that zooms in and out like a scope would be perfect for my stranger danger issues. However, that’s not cute and it cancels out quite a bit of natural light. I can make the sacrifice for the right door – but I have a feeling that only ups the price tag.

SO in the meantime I needed a change – a temporary fix. We wanted to bring out the personality of our house, make a statement in a generally drab neighborhood. We also wanted to continue the theme of happy. Some virtual friends introduced me to a new line of paint by Clark and Kensington – sold at Ace, the helpful hardware place [you have no idea how many times I hear that jingle in my house…I take that back, if you know Mick and his magnetism to cheesy commercials, then you have some idea.] Anyways, Clark and Kensington collaborated with OPI – yes, Ladies – the very OPI you put on your finger nails. After obsessively texting a friend color sample after color sample, Mick and I decided to hit up Ace [the helpful hardware place] and chose a color on a whim. I made Mick do the ordering, I will take any opportunity to laugh. I watched him confidently and seriously order a can of Modern Girl while the young man behind the counter stared at him. It was sick and hilarious and mean but it made my day.

The paint color is perfect, however, it did take almost five coats to apply which was super frustrating. We were hoping to do our basement door as well but I think we need to wait the appropriate time until we forget how frustrated we were.

BEFORE – whomp whomp

before

AFTER – we also decided to do the trim on one window to see how we liked it…and we do.

after

Then we scored some awesome rugs on clearance at Target – big day!

rugs

The end…

introverts and adventure

Welp – stir crazy is setting in and climbing the wall seems like a good idea. I am a severe introvert, time alone is heaven and quiet is my language, but, I have my limits. The first week I went entire mornings and afternoons only muttering commands to buddy…yesterday I was making up songs because the quiet was too much. I needed to recover but now it’s time for more than exercise and list making. I am happy to know I crave pieces of an extroverted lifestyle – we are always maturing I guess. Sunday our realtor said, “I know you said you don’t want neighbors but you obviously like people…” HA! Clearly, I fooled him! I do like people, I just prefer to figure them out first. Mick put it this way – Misie doesn’t need people to like her – it’s true, to a fault. I know it comes across poorly, and by poorly I mean pretentious; I am working on it. Everyone we’ve met so far [except the cashier who asked way too many personal questions – and probably wanted to keep us in her basement] is unbelievably kind and generous. It’s exciting, and scary, to push your own boundaries. This is a good thing, even if I end up in someone’s basement. [not OK!]

I finally took these off my other camera – more pictures of a road – yay!

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